Wednesday, May 18, 2005

A bee in my bonnet 

When my friend Sandra was visiting, I was horrified one day to discover an enormous stinging insect had taken up residence in my shower. Seriously, this sucker was a good 2 inches long. You could see the muscles rippling in its legs. So naturally, I hollered for Sandra, who gallantly raced up the stairs and sent my unwelcome invader to that big beehive in the sky. (Reason #382 why I suck at being a single parent: I don't kill bugs.)

A couple weeks later, I was once again horrified in that very same bathroom to discover yet another buzzing, stinging critter hanging out like he owned the joint. One bee in your bathroom--that's bad luck. Two means that maybe you have a nest in your attic and they are coming in through some unknown hole, and THAT, my friend, is a distinctly oogy feeling!

I called Phil and Amy, who immediately came to my rescue. Phil trapped this new bug in a plastic container so that the pest control guys I was going to call could get a good look at the enemy. Here is Phil with his trophy bug:

Unfortunately, nobody could come until the next day, so Mike released Mr. Bee into the wilderness. This gave me a little time to do some googling, and here is what I found out:

My 2 unwelcome guests were European hornets. (Go ahead, click that link! I dare you!!) And European hornets are--it turns out--protected under German law, so killing them is not an option (except for Sandra, who is now an international fugitive). But that's OK, because they are really gentle, misunderstood creatures who exist solely to help keep other insect populations under control. Whatever. I just don't want the damn things in my house!!!

When the wildlife agent came over the next day, he decided that they are not in my attic after all, but he does see the beginnings of a nest in the tree next to my kids' trampoline. But don't worry, because if the nest gets big and is dripping with these hornets later in the summer, he will gladly come back and put a rope (yes, a rope!) up around the tree. He better be prepared to lay down an invisible fence and equip each hornet with its own tiny little shock-collar though, because I just don't think bugs respect rope boundaries.

Apparently, the invasion of the bathroom bees is much wider spread than I could ever imagine. Phil and Amy's daughter Rebecca recently started her own blog. Check out what Rebecca found in HER bathroom earlier this evening:

Call me crazy, but I think that one looks a little bit like John Belushi.

Still my bee is cooler (it can't hurt you)

Cheeseburger, cheeseberger, cheeseburger...coke, ckoe,ckoe, no cke pepsi or somthing like that...
endangered enshmangered. Seems to me that the nest just died under mysterious circumstances in the middle of the night ("Mike? You know anything about that can of hornet spray out in the yard with no fingerprints on it?" "No mom!" "Me neither!")

Maybe the Hornets can be fed to the red cockated woodpeckers.
I get that they are misunderstood---but do they still sting?
Oh, yes, they sting! Misunderstood AND stinging--what a terrific combination.
Then I say "Die suckers!"
Do they sting? Go to that stinger page on the European Hornet website. You bet they sting, big daddy didn't have to be magnified to see if he stung!! I'm sure the first one was the biggest - you're right Bonnie, at least two inches. I still get chills, but that's what a few more years of being a single parent will do for you -- two options - execute it or live with it! Just one more "adventure" in the great European trip!!!
Post a Comment

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?