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Friday, February 25, 2005

My productive day 

I am in a much happier mood today. For one thing, these little boogers are popping out all over my front yard, and I can't help but feel good when I see spring coming on:



I planted a hundred or so randomly through my lawn last year and enjoyed them so much that this year I hired Mike and Annabelle to plant another hundred. One thing I did not enjoy last year though was watching people WALK THROUGH MY YARD and all over my precious flowers. So one of the first things I had Fred do while he was home on R&R was put in a small wire fence that goes all around our front lawn. Mike thinks that the fence makes me look like one of those cranky old ladies who taps on the window and yells, "Hey! You kids get out of my yard!" What Mike doesn't realize is that I AM one of those cranky old ladies. And now I have a fence. I just wish I could electrify it.

Lest you should think that I am cruel for putting Fred to work over his R&R, let me tell you that if Fred were a dog, he would be a border collie. He is not happy unless he has something to work on, and I happily accommodated him by presenting him with 4 pieces of IKEA furniture that needed assembling and bolting to the wall. (I teased him as he finished the last piece: "You realize, of course, that this is all just busy work, right? As soon as you leave, I'm taking everything apart and returning it to the store.") So now I am a cranky old lady with a fence, 2 bookcases, a shoe cabinet, AND a DVD storage rack. Oh, AND a much tidier basement. While the old song is right and it is indeed "nice to have a man around the house," it is even nicer to have a man who is secretly a border collie around the house. That is much harder to sing though.

Another (more important) reason that I am in a good mood today is that Fred and I have hashed out the whole promotion ceremony thing and come up with a plan. He is going to go ahead and get promoted on May 1 in Iraq. It will be a small ceremony, which he will get one of his guys to videotape for me. They can have a little celebration afterwards with Near Beer and their stinky cigars. I am off the hook as far as the VTC goes, which is a huge relief. Then, when he returns for good in July, we will have another ceremony (the REAL ceremony, as far as I'm concerned, although I will graciously allow the Army to start paying him like a colonel effective May 1). I'll pin him on one side, and the kids can give him his beret. And then we will have one big honkin' promotion party, and there will be NO Near Beer allowed, but I just might smoke a cigar.

So what, you are asking, have I done with all this happy energy? I have . . . I hope you're sitting down (although how many people surf the web on their feet?) . . . cleaned my bathroom. Not just "cleaned" as in introduced the toilet to the toilet brush and took out the trash. I mean "CLEANED," as in I purged outdated medications, I sorted, I scrubbed, I inhaled way too many toxic chemicals. I put EIGHT extra combs in a box to take to the sort center. How on earth does any one family wind up with EIGHT extra combs? And now it is so pretty, I am thinking about getting those brass poles with velvet ropes that museums use to keep people a safe distance from the exhibits. I will put them up in the doorway and just move into the kids' yucky bathroom for all my bathroom needs.

Check me out! This is what it looks like above my sink:



All those little bags in the top cabinet are those makeup bags that I get with my "free gift" after I buy my $25 pressed powder from Lancome. I probably should get rid of some of them, but while I can be merciless with extra combs, I seem to have a tender spot for zipper pouches. Who cares? Will you just LOOK at all that empty cabinet space?

Here's the true work of art though. This is what it looks like under my sink:



Do I rock, or what? Keep in mind, of course, that the health department could shut us down any day based on the state of the rest of the house. But they won't be able to find one expired aspirin in my bathroom! Or more than one comb.

Comments:
HOLY COW!!!What a difference...Can see all kinds of open shelf space!
 
Oh, how exciting--a comment from Fred! You guys should listen to him, because he KNOWS how big a mess it was.
 
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